I made my first turkey! Of course, I got a lot of grief from my dad because, even though I searched high and low, and even went so far as to stick my hand inside the thing, I couldn’t find the giblets I knew were supposed to be in there. Apparently, I was searching the wrong end, and they got cooked. Ah well, no harm, no foul.
Sometimes, it’s hard to remember exactly how much I have to be thankful for. This harvest has been long. Very very long. Kevin has been working such long hours 6 1/2 days a week. Since August at least. I do not know how military wives, or wives whose husbands travel, do it; it’s exhausting to be on solo kid detail from the moment you get up until they go to bed at night. On top of his physical absence, he’s completely expended by the end of the day, and his mind is racing thinking of all he has yet to do, so he’s not even as emotionally present as he might be. Add to that my grandma’s month long passing and my parents being out of town, and the other emotional stresses in Kevin’s family, and this harvest has been eons long. Very very long.
We’re still not done with harvest, but at least the end is in sight. Yesterday was the first day I have not had to “deal” by myself for the whole day in I don’t even know how long. My parents were here for the entire day. I had no idea how depleted I really was until I had some physical and emotional support for the day.
And on to the point of this post. Spending the entire day with my parents.
My dad and I did not have a good relationship as I was growing up, to put it minimally.
I was raised by failed parents who were trying, the best they knew how, to overcome their upbringing by failed parents. I still am working through, and may always be, trying to triumph over, some of the repercussions of my raising. It interferes with my marriage, my parenting, my friendships, even to a certain extent, my relationship with my God. I walk in more freedom now than ever before, and I am confident I will continue to heal and God will continue to restore.
With our history, it has often been a challenge to get together with my dad. It’s too easy, even though we both don’t mean to, for us to fall into old patterns of interacting and old ways of reacting.
Yesterday though, was a gift from God. An absolute gift. I was able to see, completely, wholeheartedly and without a smidge of reservation, what a changed man my dad really is. I was able to see more than just a glimpse of the man God created him to be. I was able to see true peace, true reconciliation, true harmony.
I’ve always loved and looked up to my dad. I’m beyond thrilled to be able to adore him and admire him the way I’ve always longed of doing.
I can completely sympathize! My husband is a golf pro (as in runs a pro shop and gives lessons, NOT like Tiger Woods! ha) anyways, he has LOTS of 6 day/14 hour work weeks (this was his first thanksgiving off since we've met!)–he is very busy from April until early November (well, when ever the time change is). It is very hard. I always say if we didn't argue about his work schedule, we'd never argue! ha I used to look around and see all the 9-5 husbands in our neighborhood and be so jealous, but one day it dawned on me: we have something most of them don't: we are truly crazy about each other…so I'd pick the hours over their marriages any day! 😉
I feel for you this fall with the long harvest. On a different note, I love your turkey and your "turkey pan"! I can't believe that this is your first turkey! Seriously? You? No way!
This makes me a little sad. Not for you, but for me really. I did have a close relationship with my father growing up. I was daddy's little girl. We went to baseball games together and concerts. I completely adored my father growing up. Then I met my husband. Who is 7 years older than me and probably not the man my father had envisioned me marrying. Although, I must say you know the saying women marry men like their father? Well, my husband and my father are very similar. And they butt heads terribly. And my father who I used to adore and respect is now sadly a man I dread seeing because all he ever does is give me grief about how I'm living or how I do things because they aren't exactly how he would do them. I am glad you have been able to overcome your difficulties with your father. I only hope to do the same some day with my father. And reconnect with him like we once were.