Isn’t she adorable? I have no idea what she is talking about; I can’t hear her either. Nevertheless, she is just so stinkin’ sweet, I can hardly stand it.

And then she does stuff like this:

This is our new map. Our $20 map. The map we are supposed to keep nice, to use through all the grades. The map we just got on Friday.

I am frustrated beyond all recognition.

She KNOWS she is supposed to ask to use markers. She KNOWS she is supposed to color only on paper. She is smart. She has a stellar memory. She has been getting in trouble for a FULL YEAR for coloring on stuff!

This was last summer. Not only did she color all over herself, but also our bedroom wall, the doors, my bed skirt, the mattress and the carpet. I spent over an hour with the carpet shampooer only yesterday trying to get that permanent marker incident out of sight. Trying.

I feel like a failure. I feel like I am NEVER going to get through to her. I feel like she is too much for me. Like I can’t handle it. I feel like a bad mama. I feel like just not trying anymore.

And then I remember how God never gives up on me. How I still make the same mistakes, even though I have been walking with Him for NINE years. How stubborn I can be. How God keeps disciplining me gently and lovingly (completely unlike the …ahem… screaming that may or may not have occurred in this home). How He just keeps plugging away, working on changing my heart.

And I remember how much I want to be like Him. And I remember what His Word says: So don’t get tired of doing what is good. Don’t get discouraged and give up, for we will reap a harvest of blessing at the appropriate time. – Galatians 6:9

And so I suck it up, and try again.

13 thoughts on “

  1. Excellent post! I so know how you feel. I've been feeling like not even trying anymore for a couple weeks now. This time when they are so young is so hard yet so crucial. LOVE LOVE the verse you posted too!

  2. Nail polish remover will most likely get the permanent marker off the map if the map is laminated!

    Sorry you are having such a hard time with her coloring on everything. God bless you for not freaking out!

  3. UUGGHH!!!!! I feel your pain. We had two colorers in our house. I still have marker on my dresser and nightstand. One time our youngest got ahold of a stamp pad and proceeded to put her whole hand in it and painted our staircase wall, the carpet going up the stairs and other numerous areas with a dark forest green. This too shall pass 🙂 Just buy lots of magic erasers!!!!

  4. Been done there. done that. and can't believe its been 15 years since I had a toddler! wow. I actually survived. Believe me, sometimes I didn't know if I would. And um… I'm embarrassed to even think of how many times I lost my cool and yelled or even screamed. yikes! somehow they forgave me just as I forgave them and they're all now young men who actually admire, honor, love, and respect me. And they buy me Mother's day cards that make me cry! 🙂 Hang in there. One day you'll be where I am and it will all be a long ago memory that you desperately wish you could go back to for just a day & pick one of those lil ones up & cuddle them close. <3

  5. I hear ya. I think I should do a post on all the little 'works of art' that were drawn all over our newly built home 3 yrs ago by Lulu (5)and a year ago by Hooligan (3). I think its safe to repaint now as neither are doing it anymore.

    Kudos to you for keeping perspective….

  6. I hear you! But just like you said, you are the mom that she needs, that God gave to her, and she is the daughter that you need, that God gave to you! Those spunky middle ones sure know how to spice up life, don't they?

  7. This is why we now only have washable markers in our house. Zion colored my linoleum and carpet the other day after a few good months of no naughty coloring. Right when I thought she'd been good and broken of it. Darn it.

  8. Hi, I just read this blog, and can relate. (she sounds a lot like my little three year old boy) 🙂 I love what you wrote about God not giving up on us! What lucky children you have, to have such a awesome Mommy!

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